My breasts, body hate

All too often we are not even aware of the body temple we live in. We take it for granted-usually until we have some breakdown (pain), or look in the mirror and get distressed about what we see. Worse, we’ve abused our body temples with toxic food, lack of sleep (I’m guilty of this one!), overeating, drugs, alcohol, and even sex that we’ve regretted afterward. Another abuse is self criticism-but to be ready for tantric love you must turn body hate into body love.

Building Body Love: Through the Looking Glass A fundamental part of every sex therapy seminar or workshop (I have taught a vast variety of them over the last 25 years!) involves looking at your body and changing any negative attitudes. Often called “homework,” I prefer to refer to such exercises as “homeplay,” since everything you do to increase pleasure should be play and fun, rather than work. Do this exercise for your whole body and private parts: 1. Stand naked in front of a full length mirror (a good time to do this is after a bath). Look at every part of you, starting from your feet and moving slowly up to the top of your head (as in Chapter 3, when you moved your energy through the energy centers). If you catch yourself criticizing, stop and say something kind instead; for example, “My breasts are too small” becomes “My breasts are nice and firm”; “My thighs are too bulky” becomes “My legs are so strong.” Don’t obsess that you are not telling the truth; you are simply shifting your focus and being gentler with yourself.